What is emotionally Focused Couple Therapy ?

My approach to couple counseling is Emotionally Focused Therapy:

Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) is a unique, short-term therapy (8-20 sessions) developed by Dr. Susan Johnson and Lee Greenberg in the 1980's. This highly successful method is based on attachment theory which emphasizes the importance of secure relationships, where partners are not afraid to reach for one another in their moments of need.

More than twenty-five years of research indicates that through EFT, on average, 7 out of 10 couples are able to repair their relationship. This success rate is more than double that of any other form of couple therapy.  With EFT, unhappy partners learn to repair their relationship by emotionally reconnecting and restoring the safe, loving contact that builds trust.

How can EFT help you?

Two experts in bonding look at key responses in love relationships.  

Science tells us clearly that bonding goes from the cradle to the grave. Staying close to a protective loved one is the main survival strategy of our species.

Our brains are wired to see emotional isolation as dangerous and send a panic signal when we cannot get a loved one to respond. If we can’t reconnect, we either shut down or get demanding. Both of these strategies can backfire and push our lover away.”  Dr. Susan Johnson

My couple therapy is based on the research which suggests that we are all hard-wired for emotional attachment.  When couples lose closeness and can no longer turn to their partner to help them meet their needs, they can experience high levels of distress, leading them to either distance themselves from their partner or become demanding of their partner. With EFT you will experience emotional interactions with your partner that serve as corrective bonding experiences; and this will break the repetitive negative patterns that block intimacy and safe, secure connection.

With EFT, I first make couples aware of the role they play in their negative cycle, and of the underlying emotions that fuel it. Next, I show couples how to recreate a more secure bond, by teaching them emotional responsiveness, which is turning towards one another in moments of need, rather than disconnecting. With EFT I help couples understand the emotional reasons for their disconnection, and I introduce them to the strategies for recreating safe and secure attachments.